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Grieving Dad Takes On 100KM Challenge In Wife’s Memory
This May, David Walker will take on a 100km London to Brighton Ultra challenge for ellenor, marking two years since he lost his wife Sam to cancer, aged just 37.
Emotions will be running high when he sets off on 23 May. Sam left behind three children, including their young son Logan, and the challenge is both a personal milestone and a way to give back to the charity that supported his family through her final weeks.
He said: “We are indebted to ellenor for the care and compassion Sam was shown, and for the kindness they showed her family and friends. Their service was outstanding. It’s an incredible charity that doesn’t get the financial backing it richly deserves.”
David is following a strict training programme devised by the event organisers. Along with about 2000 other determined souls, he will set off from Richmond Park and finish in Brighton as soon as the body allows.
He said: “It’s going to be a fantastic event and I’m looking forward to it. It takes place exactly two years after Sam passed away and will be the toughest challenge I have ever done physically and mentally. It will pull at every heart string.”
“Hopefully the weather will be good, and all my training will pay off. We are advised to run as much as we can and walk up the hills to catch our breath, rest and recharge.”
David first started running about 15 years ago after stepping on the scales after a Christmas of indulgence. He went on to do the London Marathon twice, once virtually due to the Covid restrictions, setting his own route from his home in New Ash Green. He remembers it as one of his most difficult runs, with no one to cheer him on his way.
“I just put one front in front of the other, just like you do in life,” he said. “You must keep on going. I feel lucky enough, and blessed, that I can run as there are millions of people who can’t, whether through physical disability or illness. I really enjoy running and it has helped me especially during the past two years. It’s given me time to be in my own world and to listen to whatever I like in my headphones – it’s great mental and physical release.”
David, known as Walks by his friends, had a false start last year when a prolapsed disc put paid to his plans to take on the challenge, but now feels healed and ready to embrace the Ultra.
Raising money for ellenor has become an important family goal. David’s mother-in-law Sandra Bright, who started running about three years ago, is due to run the London Landmarks Half Marathon for ellenor on April 12.
He said: “This will be her first half marathon, and I will be up there with little Logan cheering her along.”
Logan, now three, was born in December 2022 and his mum passed away less than 18 months later after being diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma (bile duct cancer). The family knew that Sam probably did not have long to live as the survival rate is just five percent over five years. Bile duct cancer is incredibly aggressive and generally inoperable.
David said: “She had chemo which she took on board like the absolute soldier that she was, and she continued to be as active as possible. She was someone who very rarely put herself first.”
Sam’s main tumour measured 13 cm and unfortunately chemotherapy and immunotherapy had little effect.
“That was very hard to accept,” said David. “We received the news that the treatment wasn’t working on March 24and at the end of April Sam suffered a stroke and she very quickly went downhill.”
At this stage, the couple were referred to a palliative care doctor at ellenor, who visited the couple at home, introducing pain control for Sam and changing some of her medication.
David, 56, said: “Sam soon deteriorated and being at home was incredibly difficult, especially with Logan. I was trying to juggle everything, and my main concern was obviously Sam and her pain.”
A few days later, Sam was admitted to the inpatient ward at ellenor in Northfleet.
“We had such a beautiful room,” said David. “They got Sam settled and did everything for us. The doctor said it was possible Sam might have had another stroke, but we agreed we didn’t want to put her through the stress of another scan. It was so lovely for people to be honest with us. It’s almost impossible for doctors and nurses to predict what will happen and they can’t give false hope, but they were able to tell us that Sam probably only had days.”
David spent his days and night at the hospice, as did her parents. Other family members and friends were also welcomed to her room on the ward including Logan and Sam’s other two children, Dylan 15, and Ella, 20, who was sitting her A-levels at the time.
“Sam continued to fight to allow everyone who wanted to visit her to come,” said David. “Everyone who wanted to see her was able to, as difficult as that was. Nothing was ever too much trouble for the staff at ellenor. The service we received was outstanding.
“I wouldn’t say it made a difficult time easy but knowing Sam was receiving the best possible care was worth so much to us. It’s been a heart-breaking journey, and we want to help other families who are also going through it.”
For families like David’s, ellenor is there in the moments most people never see managing pain, guiding conversations and helping people feel less alone at the hardest time of their lives.
Now, through this challenge, David is determined to make sure other families receive that same care, when they need it most.
- If you would like to sponsor David’s please go to his JustGiving page.
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